Many different thoughts have raced through my mind the past few months and extensively the past week or so discussing certain things with Pet again. I will admit that at one or maybe even a few points it occurred that perhaps Pet and I were not meant to be and I should seek a more suitable companion. Love is such a fickle beast of ones soul, however. As much as "mind" said staying may be a poor choice, heart and soul said "you will regret it forever if you take the easy path now." It is also hard for me to accept at this point in our relationship that it is not "right" or we do not belong together. Everyone goes through episodes and our relationship is certainly strained by many factors.
In the end what it boils down to is the fact that I love Pet more than I have ever loved anyone or anything in my entire life and am happy to experience this with her. I am accepting of her and who she is and I can not overlook that (some doms would say TOO accepting and I allow her to push too much but that is for me to decide). Inexperience combined with distance has not made this an easy adventure for either of us. But it is a journey and an adventure I am glad to be on. Again I think that is what it all boils down to is the fact that it is a journey for both of us and I would not have any other person to share it with.
Pet is quite the handful...to be honest she's an outright rebellious little wench at times that deserves a good smacking or spanking (or to be bound, given 'the stare', etc...) . I believe that to be part of our trouble at times because I am not right there to do either, to give that first hand attention. In any event, trying to learn the ropes of dominating someone as defiant as Pet has not been the easiest job.
Oddly enough I do not wish to break her. Given time and a firm hand I have no doubts my will would finally bend and break hers. But having a broken and whimpering pet is not something I relish. As much as I dislike being clawed, I would rather have a spunky, vibrant and happy pet than a meek and broken down slave licking my toes every day. Knowing how pet is and accepting that as part and parcel of the package is just a piece of what she and I will have to learn together.
She needs to learn her place better than she has. She has a complicated life which makes it hard for certain principals to be adapted on top of her rebellious nature but I think she is capable of understanding her role better. Owner is willing to allow her privileges and accept parts of her life most others would not, I think; she just needs to realize that when all is said and done that Owner holds the key. I deserve her respect and love and even if I do something which makes her claw and bite. She must understand that she needs to accept the consequences without scampering away.
I need to understand more that she is a cat and not a dog (nice blog by Pet I think). I think she summed up her Identity Crisis fairly well and as succinctly as I was going to here.
Pet is a Cat. She loves attention at times, when it suits her. When it does not it can be quite the bother. She is submissive to a point. Certainly not a slave but nor do I really believe her to be a switch (nor would I accept a Switch relationship, I am not submissive). She does like to gain control at times and wants things her own way. Learning when to hold kitty tighter and when to let kitty go is going to be the difficult part. Pet also has to realize that while cats are fairly independent - they also need their masters to survive in the luxurious life that they have. Bite and claw all you want but you are not always going to have your way. Accept and live with that.
-Signed, Owner
In the end what it boils down to is the fact that I love Pet more than I have ever loved anyone or anything in my entire life and am happy to experience this with her. I am accepting of her and who she is and I can not overlook that (some doms would say TOO accepting and I allow her to push too much but that is for me to decide). Inexperience combined with distance has not made this an easy adventure for either of us. But it is a journey and an adventure I am glad to be on. Again I think that is what it all boils down to is the fact that it is a journey for both of us and I would not have any other person to share it with.
Pet is quite the handful...to be honest she's an outright rebellious little wench at times that deserves a good smacking or spanking (or to be bound, given 'the stare', etc...) . I believe that to be part of our trouble at times because I am not right there to do either, to give that first hand attention. In any event, trying to learn the ropes of dominating someone as defiant as Pet has not been the easiest job.
Oddly enough I do not wish to break her. Given time and a firm hand I have no doubts my will would finally bend and break hers. But having a broken and whimpering pet is not something I relish. As much as I dislike being clawed, I would rather have a spunky, vibrant and happy pet than a meek and broken down slave licking my toes every day. Knowing how pet is and accepting that as part and parcel of the package is just a piece of what she and I will have to learn together.
She needs to learn her place better than she has. She has a complicated life which makes it hard for certain principals to be adapted on top of her rebellious nature but I think she is capable of understanding her role better. Owner is willing to allow her privileges and accept parts of her life most others would not, I think; she just needs to realize that when all is said and done that Owner holds the key. I deserve her respect and love and even if I do something which makes her claw and bite. She must understand that she needs to accept the consequences without scampering away.
I need to understand more that she is a cat and not a dog (nice blog by Pet I think). I think she summed up her Identity Crisis fairly well and as succinctly as I was going to here.
Pet is a Cat. She loves attention at times, when it suits her. When it does not it can be quite the bother. She is submissive to a point. Certainly not a slave but nor do I really believe her to be a switch (nor would I accept a Switch relationship, I am not submissive). She does like to gain control at times and wants things her own way. Learning when to hold kitty tighter and when to let kitty go is going to be the difficult part. Pet also has to realize that while cats are fairly independent - they also need their masters to survive in the luxurious life that they have. Bite and claw all you want but you are not always going to have your way. Accept and live with that.
-Signed, Owner
1 comments:
glad to see you back. =)
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