As pet has already mentioned in her post, I did break things off with her recently. Was such a hard thing for me to do. I feel closer and more in 'sync' with Pet than with anyone else I have ever been with. We have our differences, to be sure, yet I am inclined to believe that her and I share more alike than anyone I have previously been involved with. More importantly to me, as well as her, is the consideration that some of the things we share and have explored with each other - are phenomena we have "unlocked" in each other and feel only comfortable sharing with one another.
I feel no need to go into detailed reasoning here. Suffice to say I felt a major loss of connection with pet and felt that whatever we had was lost. Pet did not seem to argue any points with me, did not put up a fuss, whimper, fight or otherwise make any noise about the subject. As she stated herself, she felt a weight lifted from her shoulders. From that perspective and my own I just felt as if things had come to a conclusion between us, albeit one I did not readily want to accept or savor.
Out of the blue Pet started tentatively rubbing my leg again. At first I have had major reservations. Is this just another passing fad? Is it a fashionable Mood? Something in the air? Why let it fall apart so easily, seemingly, and now want to start it back up again. Then there is always the reverberations of "I let her go...shouldnt I just move on?"Trying to figure it out.
In the end though I feel like this is a fresh start. A breath of new life into a relationship that is the most intense and fulfilling of my life when all is well. I am willing to give it another pass and see where the road leads to this time. Putting aside doubts and reservations... I have never been one to do anything half-assed, I see no reason to start now. Trying to start over again with baggage and doubts, I think, would only hinder this new spark and snuff it ere it had a chance to burst to new flame.
Another vacation to see Pet in August will set conditions in a firmer foundation. I look forward to exploring our BDSM with each other first hand in all of it's glory. It may not be for long but it will certainly not be wasted time.
I feel no need to go into detailed reasoning here. Suffice to say I felt a major loss of connection with pet and felt that whatever we had was lost. Pet did not seem to argue any points with me, did not put up a fuss, whimper, fight or otherwise make any noise about the subject. As she stated herself, she felt a weight lifted from her shoulders. From that perspective and my own I just felt as if things had come to a conclusion between us, albeit one I did not readily want to accept or savor.
Out of the blue Pet started tentatively rubbing my leg again. At first I have had major reservations. Is this just another passing fad? Is it a fashionable Mood? Something in the air? Why let it fall apart so easily, seemingly, and now want to start it back up again. Then there is always the reverberations of "I let her go...shouldnt I just move on?"Trying to figure it out.
In the end though I feel like this is a fresh start. A breath of new life into a relationship that is the most intense and fulfilling of my life when all is well. I am willing to give it another pass and see where the road leads to this time. Putting aside doubts and reservations... I have never been one to do anything half-assed, I see no reason to start now. Trying to start over again with baggage and doubts, I think, would only hinder this new spark and snuff it ere it had a chance to burst to new flame.
Another vacation to see Pet in August will set conditions in a firmer foundation. I look forward to exploring our BDSM with each other first hand in all of it's glory. It may not be for long but it will certainly not be wasted time.
1 comments:
I just noticed that half of Sir's post come through as posted by me... that's because I have to go in and format them once he's posted to make them tidy!
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